This is taken from “The Poorman” blog. Too funny not to post. This takes us in our time machine to year 2015 for the new SAT test.
PART A: Science
1. A strain of bacteria, after repeated exposure to an antibiotic, develops a resistance to that antibiotic. This is an example of:
C. how the liberal media lies
D. why faith healing is better than secular medicine
2. Global temperatures have risen 1 degree F since 2004. This is due to:
A. the greenhouse effect
B. unsound science
C. the Clinton administration
3. Scientific theories are:
A. ones which makes predictions one can test against experimental data
B. only theories
C. used by out-of-the-mainstream liberal eggheads to oppress white people
D. tricks of Satan
PART B: Mathematics
1. Pi is:
A. the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter
C. I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that my dad makes a lot of money
D. something Greek homosexuals invented to turn you gay
2. If dinosaurs first appeared 250 million years ago, and became extinct 185 million years later, how long ago did they become extinct?
A. 65 million years ago
B. There is no paleontological consensus that dinosaurs ever existed
C. 3500 years ago, during the Flood
D. However long ago it was that they turned gay and lost their moral values
3. If you make $50,000 a year, and the flat income tax rate is 10%, how much money do you pay the IRS each year?
B. Too much.
C. $0. The federal government has no Constitutional right to inconvenience me.
D. The IRS is part of the gay mafia.
PART C: History
1. The US lost the Vietnam War because:
A. we miscalculated the determination of the enemy.
B. liberals and the media wouldn’t let Rambo do his job.
C. IT WAS A TIE!
D. Clinton made everyone in the Army get gay married.
2. Who led the American army during the Revolutionary War?
A. George Washington
B. George W. Bush
C. Ronald Reagan
3. Who betrayed the American army during the Revolutionary War?
A. Benedict Arnold
B. Bill Clinton
C. Hillary Clinton
D. The Jews
PART D: Literature
1. What is the greatest book ever written by an American?
A. The Great Gatsby
B. A Charge to Keep
C. Left Behind 2: Tribulation Force
D. The Bible
2. In Shakespeare’s “Julius Caesar”, Caesar is betrayed by:
C. the liberal media
D. the Jews
3. In 1609, Galileo looked through a telescope and saw four small bodies orbiting Jupiter. This showed:
A. that not all celestial bodies orbit the Earth, and that the Earth is not necessarily at the center of the Universe
B. there is no astronomical consensus that anything orbits Jupiter
C. Galileo was a biased liberal
D. the telescope was gay
Scoring is at the discretion of your local school board.