Oct 062013
 

Don Jon Movie PosterA New Jersey guy dedicated to his family, friends, and church, develops unrealistic expectations from watching porn and works to find happiness and intimacy with his potential true love. Jon Martello objectifies everything in his life: his apartment, his car, his family, his church, and, of course, women. His buddies even call him Don Jon because of his ability to pull “10s” every weekend without fail. Yet even the finest flings don’t compare to the transcendent bliss he achieves alone in front of the computer watching pornography. Dissatisfied, he embarks on a journey to find a more gratifying sex life, but ends up learning larger lessons of life and love through relationships with two very different women.

In Theaters: September 27, 2013; MPAA Rating: R (for strong graphic sexual material and dialogue throughout, nudity, language and some drug use.) Genres: Comedy

Director: Joseph Gordon-Levitt

Writer: Joseph Gordon-Levitt

Cast: Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Scarlett Johansson, Julianne Moore, Tony Danza, Glenne Headly, Brie Larson, Rob Brown, Jeremy Luke, Paul Ben-Victor, Italia Ricci, Lindsey Broad, Amanda Perez

Me and Lay watched this movie in Brandon Friday night. We both enjoyed it, and got a lot of laughs. I’m OK with some romantic comedies, but generally they can be formulaic and unrealistic. I thought Don Jon went against that grain, and provided a more challenging story line. He takes a topic not usually handled in a serious way, and presents it realistically, but with great humor. Indeed, the film is very non-judgmental in its handling the topic of how we all get self-absorbed, and misguided by expecting a Hollywood experience in life. Continue reading »

Sep 282010
 

It appears that little Ms. “I dabbled in witchcraft” says she wants to stop everyone from having sex. This from the lady who’s claimed publicly to have had sex on a satanic altar. Personally, she would just be a side-show idiot, were people not willing to vote for her to sit in a seat in the Senate of the United States of America. She’s a Palin favorite, but that comes as no surprise, since, like Sara, she just makes up the truth as she goes along.

The thing that really disgusts me is that in this video she claims to be chaste at 30, but on other occasions she’s claimed she boozed it up in college and woke up with a different man every morning. So the truth is whatever it needs to be for the audience and the message she’s making up at the moment.

She reminds of a Milton Berle joke, “I knew Doris Day before she was a virgin.”

You need to a flashplayer enabled browser to view this YouTube video

I get it though. The Republicans believe in freedom. The freedom to stop people from having sex, the freedom to come into your bedroom, the freedom to vote for which religion you can follow, and the list of freedoms the republicans believe in goes on and on.

I realize most Republicans don’t read books, but for those of us who read Orwell, I believe, if memory serves, in “1984” he wrote about the totalitarian state having a “youth anti-sex league.” Maybe the Republicans could form one of those, and they could have uniforms (the Republicans love uniforms), and they can be sure and make them wear flag pins on their lapels.

Mar 112008
 

Good grief, could any more be made of this? New York Governor Elliot Spitzer had apparently been paying for a little something on the side, so now the Republicans demand that he resign. Senator David Vitter (R. Louisiana) was implicated in a prostitution case, but never resigned…why the double standard?

Spitzer is like Bill Clinton. He is a very smart guy who has done a lot of good. This makes lots of bad people really mad at you (read Republicans). He revealed schemes that were costing ordinary people to pay more for their insurance. He slapped down people who were a half-step from blatant self-dealing. He exposed such stuff as bid rigging. Got of Dick and George’s friends into some serious trouble.

Then he goes and does a really really dumb thing. Also like Clinton, he obviously couldn’t control some stupid urges for just a few years. It was a dumb thing to do, and it’s idiotic to be in such a highly visible public office, and think you can get away with it. It’s also wrong. He’s a married man with a family, and his family will deal with him appropriately.

However, let’s look at this situation. First, how did this all get started. The story is that a bank sent a suspicious activity report to the IRS, so federal agents started investigating. Duhh. Spitzer is a wealthy man. I’m guessing he moves around large sums fairly regularly. That’s what rich people do. So now we have our FBI taking resources from that all consuming, all import war on terror protecting the homeland bullshit to investigate a high class hooker operation. I love how my tax dollars get spent.

So then what happens. Spitzer calls an “escort service” in Washington to arrange for an “escort.” OK, as noted above, it is the wrong thing to do…no question, but now we have the Republicans and the media coming out with talking points and headlines about Spitzer being “involved in a prostitution ring.” Listen to me…the guy hired a hooker. Saying he’s involved in a prostitution ring is like me saying I’m involved in the fast food franchise business just because I ate at McDonald’s one day last week. Get a grip people.

In an MSNBC report, you have law enforcement officials disclosing the gory details to make it look as bad as possible, but then demand anonymity because of “the sensitivity of the case.” Give me a break. If the case is so sensitive, what difference does it make if they disclose this information officially or anonymously? I’m sure it has nothing to do with Spitzer taking down a few of Dick Cheney’s Wall Street buddies.

And here’s a word to you Republican Assembly Leader Tedisco. Until you demand that Vitter resign from the U.S. Senate, you need to shut up about Spitzer.

Nov 182007
 

This must be from the “are you shitting me” category. Krazy Kristian Kook, Don Wildmon, of the American Family Association is now warning that hotels are taking out the Gideon Bibles in favor so “intimacy kits.” In one of their many “Action Alerts,” Wildmon raises the alarm based on the following?

For instance, at New York City’s trendy Soho Grand Hotel guests can enjoy a gourmet mini-bar, an iPod, a flat-screen TV and even the company of a complimentary pet goldfish.

OK, I guess the mini-bar can be used to get a little drunk, thus lowering inhibitions. I’m sure the iPod is loaded with that evil rock music that just makes people strip nekkid and have depraved sex, and of course the vile “all sex all the time” TV programming on Comedy Central is quite the marital aid, but for the life of me, I can’t quite figure out the complimentary pet goldfish.

I never really expected to write a post that included Goldfish, sex and iPods as tags. Leave it to good old Don to come through.

Jul 172007
 

Senator David Vitter is the United States Senator who was on the phone records for the D.C. Madame. He went into exclusion for a while, then came to give a brief statement, have his wife pimp for him, and then duck out the back door as if nothing had happened. It was a pretty shameful display, and I’ve sent him the following letter: 

Hon. David Vitter
United States Senate
516 Hart Senate Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20510

Dear Senator Vitter:

I watched your “press conference” today, and can’t begin to describe my disappointment. While I realize the political establishment is rife with hypocrisy, rarely have I seen a more arrogant display.

You march your wife in to attempt to shame the media and public because it is, “a private affair between a husband and wife.” You certainly didn’t feel that way when someone else (read Clinton) was involved, and in fact built your political career bashing Clinton and calling for his resignation for the same thing for which you are guilty. Why do you think you get a free pass?

You attempted to play the “victim card,” claiming this was all the fault of some of your political enemies. Hogwash Senator! Unless you have proof it was your political enemies calling the brothel from your phone, then this situation is entirely of your making.

I’m not a prude. I don’t care to hear the sexual proclivities of other people…even politicians. I agree it should be between a couple. The government and the media have no business in that part of anyone’s life, but you sir are the one that has taken the fight to the streets. You publicly bashed President Clinton; you demean gay people and try to restrict their rights to live in peace and love who they choose; you demand absolute moral purity from every elected official not “on your side” of the issues; you proclaim your absolute support for “family values” in the public discourse…so no sir, you don’t get a free pass.

You called on another politician to resign for his sexual promiscuity. I expect you to hold yourself to that same standard of conduct.

Apr 132006
 

Each place has its own advantages – heaven for the climate, and hell for the society. –Mark Twain

We started our series on Smart Thoughts with Mark Twain, so it shouldn’t surprise you that I love many of his writings, and have lots of his sayings on this site. On of my favorite writings by Twain is his “The War Prayer.” It’s a short essay, and if you have never read it, you should.

Twain had a healthy skepticism toward religion. I don’t think he was an atheist, merely wise enough to see how we belittle God, and co-opt him for our own ends. I think it’s obvious in this quote that Twain believes that if everything thought to be sin condemns one to hell, then all the most interesting people will be there.

His cynicism comes through in another quote I have on the site. It’s an obvious jab at those that have made “sex” such a part of religious dogma. Twain says, “Of the delights of this world, man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.”

The words of Twain have proved timeless, and these all the more so.

Mar 312006
 
This entry is part 18 of 46 in the series Deep Questions

Several sources give credit to the great Cole Porter for coining the phrase. One of the legendary musician’s more famous songs was “Let’s Do It.” The 1928 standard contains the lyrics:

Birds do it, bees do it
Even educated fleas do it
Let’s do it, let’s fall in love

World Wide Words goes on to explain that the first “explicit use of the phrase” didn’t occur until 1939. An article on filmmaking from the Freeport Journal Standard stated: “A Frenchman was born sophisticated: he knows about the birds and the bees.” Hey, hey — vive la France!

The Straight Dope believes poet Samuel Coleridge was the likely originator. His poem, the cheerfully titled “Work Without Hope,” opens with:

All Nature seems at work. Slugs leave their lair–
The bees are stirring–birds are on the wing–

In other words, when the birds start moving and the bees start grooving, it’s on like Donkey Kong.While there’s no real consensus on how the term came about, most folks cite Mr. Porter. If you’d like a final opinion on the matter, we suggest you ask your health teacher.

Dec 072005
 

Famed homophobic bigot and all around sex-obsessed Hillsborough County Commissioner Rhonda Storms has called for a referendum on nudity. I can’t tell if she wants more of it or less, but having seen her ass in a pair of pants…I’m hoping less. In keeping with her past MO, she sprung this on the other Commissioners without warning.

The Tampa Tribune reports:

Her proposal caught other commissioners off guard. They said it’s premature to call for such a referendum.

Storms is quoted as saying, “This industry is very brazen and bold because the signal from local government is we are not going to treat you seriously.”

Storms is such an incredible nut job. I sent the following letter to the Tribune…maybe it will get published.

In regards to Rhonda Storms’ most recent tirade about strippers, I think it was best said by the Bard, “Me thinks thou dost protest too much,” or as my Grandfather said, “the bit dog barks first.”

This lady clearly has an unnatural obsession with the sex lives of everyone else in the world. My experience is that generally, people like her usually have serious issues of their own. I wish the people in her district would quit foisting her embarrassing escapades on all of Hillsborough County, and let her go back to whatever it is she’s into that doesn’t involve everyone else.

This thing of throwing these major proposals at the entire Commission without warning is growing old. She needs to remember that she and her up-tight Puritan brethren are not the only people living in this County. There are much more critical issues than someone getting a lap dance in a motor home.

UPDATE: The letter above appears in the Sunday, Dec. 11 edition of the Tampa Tribune (Commentary).

Mar 122005
 

American Pie (1999)Four teenage boys enter a pact to lose their virginity by prom night.

Directed by
Paul Weitz

Genres
Comedy

Cast
Jason Biggs, Chris Klein, Thomas Ian Nicholas, Alyson Hannigan, Shannon Elizabeth, Tara Reid, Eddie Kaye Thomas, Seann William Scott, Eugene Levy, Natasha Lyonne, Mena Suvari, Jennifer Coolidge, Chris Owen, Molly Cheek, Lawrence Pressman

American Pie has all the ingredients of a good movie. First, the plot deals with young people in search of their first sexual experience. What could be more basic to the human condition? Second, although obviously fiction, the film has a feeling of reality capturing the awkwardness and anxiety of young people at this point in their lives. Third, it is well written and not always predictable as each young man employs his own strategy, and of course, in the real world things do not always go as planned. Fourth, the cast consists of very talented young actors playing characters which may remind the audience of people they may have known. Fifth, the film has its poignant moments. The final ingredient is this movie is hilarious. The film has one liners, sight gags, and situations that very funny. The audience, which ranged from teenagers to middle age, laughed almost constantly and out loud.

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars6 Stars7 Stars8 Stars9 Stars10 Stars (1 votes, average: 7.00 out of 10)
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