Dec 062015

Suddenly, everyone’s a warrior in the war against terror. That is of course only the terrorists attacks that 1. Don’t involve white male American terrorists, and/or 2. Aren’t likely to actually happen in the first place. Take inspiration for the protection of the homeland from some Facebook posts from early this morning. Here you’ll see the batshittery we’ve devolved into in this country.

It started with this fairly incoherent post, which I mostly just ignored after assuming the person who wrote it was either high, drunk, or both.


So, I’m sure you can understand that, right off the bat, I’m a little concerned. I’m still trying to figure out what are the “…very wages of defense…” and especially the part about, “…that I as well with just cause and overwhelming belief in Liberty and Justice for All so solemnly swear, amen.” Of course that whole part about “liberty and justice for all” applies, in his mind, to only white, straight, male, Christians who believe exactly as he does.

But it gets better. Out fearless defender of everything righteous and holy that is Uhmerika is out-right inviting the jihadists to come to his house so that he can personally kill them.

But what I enjoy is how they are all big talk until it’s time to put up. Invite them to go sign up, and you can see the vitriol that follows that invitation.


Apparently, this person actually believes the terrorists are going to come riding down main street in Kings Mountain any day now, and he and another friend are prepared to take them out just as the partisans took out the Nazis in WW2…because that’s who defeated Hitler…the partisans.

Naturally, this person and another, go on to explain how their age and current physical condition prevent them from serving or they’d definitely go sign up. Well, physical condition is pretty much something one can change and improve, and there are no age restrictions with some of the contractors I know providing “support services” to the war on terror. But that wouldn’t actually cross their minds.


When you get to the part about “God given ability that seems to kick in and kick ass…” part, you have to start wondering about whether this person should be allowed to own a gun, but I’m pretty sure he owns several, and lots of ammunition…for the imminent and certain attack of the jihadists on Gold Street in Kings Mountain, North Carolina. For those of you not familiar with Kings Mountain, and more specifically Gold Street, there is an important landmark the city built a few years ago right at Gold Street and one of City’s main streets.


Now I love my hometown, and lots of the people who live there were great positive influences in my life. I’m not making fun of my town…it’s a small southern town that was too dependent for too many years on textile manufacturing, and a lot of good folks there are doing the best they can to bring it back. What I am making fun of is the belief that a few people there have that they need to be concerned that a terror attack in Kings Mountain is imminent. It is a town that has welcomed Cambodian and South Vietnamese refugees in the past. Some live just down the street from my mother. I don’t know if there are Muslims living in that community, but if there are, I fear for them, because people like this will eventually go instigate a situation so they can feel all brave and manly and heroic.

I try to muster feelings of sympathy for people who suffer from this kind of mental pathology, but I just can’t anymore. It’s tiresome, and it is embarrassing coming from people in a country that was once able to build the greatest industrial power the world has seen. From a country where each generation used to get smarter and richer than the previous generation. It’s people like this who are cowardly, and need an enemy to hate and blame for their misfortune. And they are people who are too lazy to learn and understand the very real issues we face today, and demand that our leaders deal with them. They’re barricaded in their homes with guns and ammo on their laps just waiting on the terrorists to show up at their door (if Obama doesn’t come by first to take their guns), tuned in to Fox News taking their cues from an Australian media mogul with an agenda all his own.

I also no longer have sympathy because these are the kind of ammosexuals who demand that every single person be permitted to have any type of and as many guns as possible, and who all believe they are responsible, sane gun owners. One doesn’t have to read too far in these posts to think this guy’s neighbors need to be the ones living in fear, not all the jihadists converging on Kings Mountain.

Louie Gohmert-History Professor

 Congress, Featured, Politics  Comments Off on Louie Gohmert-History Professor
Jul 112014
This entry is part 13 of 31 in the series Daily Douche-Bag

Louie GohmertWell, you had to know it wouldn’t take long for Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Texas, naturally) to earn our Daily Douche award. (I can imagine Louie becoming the reigning champion.) So Louie, ever obsessed with illegal aliens, now has a solution for the child refugees fleeing the drug wars in their Central American home countries. Louie thinks we should invade Mexico just like John Pershing did in pursuing Pancho Villa (so successfully).

“If he wanted to, he could do what Woodrow Wilson did — and he’s certainly not one of my favorite presidents,” Gohmert said on Tuesday. “But after Pancho Villa’s gangs came across, I believe in Arizona, and killed some American families, he said, ‘That’s it.’ He sent John Pershing with troops into Mexico. And you can read some different versions. Tens of thousands of National Guard were put on the border. And Dan, nobody came in that we didn’t want to come in.”

First, let’s remember that the Mexican Constitution prohibits foreign troops in Mexico, so they’d have to treat an invasion by our troops as an act of war, and because of that Constitutional prohibition, can’t invite our troops in. Of course, Louie’s never shown himself to be much of an U.S. constitutional scholar, so why would we expect him to bother with the Constitution of any other country. Continue reading »

Crazies out in Force Friday

 Congress, Politics  Comments Off on Crazies out in Force Friday
Jun 262010

Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-1st TX) speaking on the floor about the terrorists babies coming to destroy our way of life. He reports a conversation with an un-named “retired” FBI agent who claimed terrorists were gaming our system by sneaking in pregnant women to have their babies here, then taking them back (and they don’t even have to pay anything for the babies) and raising them in the “terrorist way of life,” so they can send them back in 20-30 years to destroy our way of life.

I can only hope (but I doubt) that other Republicans think to themselves, “Oh shit Gohmert is speaking again.”


Louie, the only thing stupid we are doing is continuing to elect people like you to public office.

Airport Security Follies

 Crime, Culture, Society, Travel  Comments Off on Airport Security Follies
Dec 302007

The New York Times has a great Op-Ed about the foolishness of the TSA security screenings at airports. It points out, as most thinking people have to come realize that this is mostly feel-good theater that does no actual good at preventing another terrorist attack.

They point out the fallacy of our fearless leaders’ claims that the planes of 9/11 were hijacked “using box cutters.” I’ve said all along, as does the article, that the hijackers took advantage of the hijacking template created in the past, where passive resistance was the approach to end a hijacking, and the pointy objects they used as weapons really didn’t matter. Today’s hijackers would face a very different sort of reaction from the passengers and crew.

The article addresses the silliness of the 3 oz. container rule.

The folly is much the same with respect to the liquids and gels restrictions, introduced two summers ago following the breakup of a London-based cabal that was planning to blow up jetliners using liquid explosives. Allegations surrounding the conspiracy were revealed to substantially embellished. In an August, 2006 article in the New York Times, British officials admitted that public statements made following the arrests were overcooked, inaccurate and “unfortunate.” The plot’s leaders were still in the process of recruiting and radicalizing would-be bombers. They lacked passports, airline tickets and, most critical of all, they had been unsuccessful in actually producing liquid explosives. Investigators later described the widely parroted report that up to ten U.S airliners had been targeted as “speculative” and “exaggerated.”

You see, the point is that terrorism needs to be handled by law enforcement and intelligence activities (as it was in the London case). As the authors note, once a terrorist has reached the airport, it’s usually too late. Not only have most of us inadvertently passed through security with “banned” items, but a deadly sharp point can be fashioned from any number of things available once one is on the plane. (Just watch one of these prison documentaries on MSNBC sometime.)

Unfortunately, the government has crafted the system to protect itself and be self-perpetuating. If one protests, you are usually marked for questioning and additional screening, and could wind up on the no-fly list…so no one protests. Recently, they’ve announced silly rules relative to taking along spare batteries. Who knows when the stupidity will end.

Oct 312007

According to a report in the USAToday, the Terrorist Watch list now contains 755,000 names. Approximately 200,000 names have been added each year since 2004. Obviously this raises a ton of concerns by those interested in civil liberties. The list is quickly headed to a million, and it’s shear size makes it impossible to use it effectively.

“It undermines the authority of the list,” says Lisa Graves of the Center for National Security Studies. “There’s just no rational, reasonable estimate that there’s anywhere close to that many suspected terrorists.”

Now why does Ms. Graves think our government gives a happy damn about that. (Rational, reasonable…not words I associate with the current Administration.) Cheney would prefer that everyone besides his Haliburton and Blackwater friends be put on the list. It’s like these sexual predator registries. Every person that’s ever committed a crime that involved their genitals gets on the list. Get caught peeing in public…get put on the sexual offender registry. If you’re a teenager and you have sex with your teenage girlfriend, off to the sex offender registry.

If I go to the FDLE sex offender website and put in my zip code, something over three hundred hits come back. Now what am I supposed to do to try to protect against that many people. This terror watch list is the same way. This is the classic American penchant for overreaction. It cannot be effective. If there are nearly a million terrorists already in this country, we’re doomed.

Just more idiocy from the Department of Homeland Stupidity.

Jul 292007

In his weekly radio address Bu$h demanded that Congress update the laws governing electronic surveillance. Now why would George give a damn about whether the law is up-to-date or not. It’s not like the Cheney/Bush Administration is following any of the laws anyway.

Jul 192007

This didn’t even make a splash in this country. I found the story on the British Guardian website. Seems that Bush signed an executive order giving the Secretary of the Treasury the authority to seize property and assets of anyone the Administration determines to be aiding terrorists.

President Bush unveiled an executive order that allows the administration to block bank accounts and any other financial assets that might be found in this country belonging to people, companies or groups that the United States deems are working to threaten stability in Iraq.

This goes along with the idea that they can declare you an enemy combatant, and strip you of your Constitutional Rights as well. Yep, after a mere 230 years, portions of the Constitution (or the whole thing I suppose) can just be suspended by Executive Order of King George. Of course Whitehouse Spokesman Tony Snow promised it would only be used against terrorists.

When will we put a stop to the madness? When will Americans demand that their nation be returned?

May 092007

By Michael Hampton at Homeland Stupidity

Boston became the laughingstock of the country earlier this year after two incidents in which it responded to harmless devices as if they were real terrorist threats. Now Sen. Ed Kennedy (D-Mass.) wants to make absurd overreaction into national policy.

On January 31, Boston terrorized its own citizens, closing down traffic in parts of the city for several hours and sending out bomb squads to remove what turned out to be light boards, part of a marketing campaign by Turner Broadcasting for its Aqua Teen Hunger Force cartoon. That’s bad enough, but to make matters worse, officials continued to publicly call the light boards threats, even after they had been informed as to what they were.

Some people thought it was a fluke. But on February 28, they did it again. This time, they blew up a state-owned traffic counting device.

While Mayor Thomas Menino was able to extort $2 million from Turner Broadcasting to reimburse the city for his officials’ mistakes in the Mooninite incident, he completely failed to get any money out of the Commonwealth for blowing up its traffic counter. He did, however, prove that absurd overreaction to completely harmless, ordinary things is city policy.

And this isn’t even new for Boston; it turns out they have a long history of misinterpreting and overreacting to common, ordinary things. In 2004, officials there charged Joe Previtera with two felonies, “false report of location of explosives” and a “hoax device” for his protest in which he dressed like a tortured prisoner from Abu Ghraib prison in Iraq. Officials complained about the stereo wires tied to his fingers. (The charges were later dropped.)

Sen. Kennedy’s bill, S. 735, the so-called Terrorist Hoax Improvements Act of 2007. The act would, among other things, attach civil liability to anyone whose actions were misinterpreted by authorities as being a hoax and who didn’t immediately notify those authorities about the actual nature of the incident.

This would make it much easier for officials to get large sums of money out of hapless people and companies who weren’t making any hoaxes at all, nor intending to do so. In other words, if the cops go nuts and overreact to something you did, even if it was perfectly reasonable and normal, you could be required to pay for the emergency response, no matter how absurd their actions were.

And the worst part of this bill?

“There’s nothing in the bill allowing individuals or corporations to sue government officials when hare-brained overreactions interfere with their lives and business or destroy their property,” says Jim Harper, director of information policy studies at the Cato Institute.

I disagree.

The worst part of this bill is that it discourages anything “out of the ordinary.” Ultimately, this bill and bills like it which will certainly follow will enforce a national policy of uniformity in every aspect of our lives. Wearing the wrong color hat could someday be a crime. Oh, wait, in some places it already is.

We are all unique people. Allowing this stupidity to go forward is just one of many steps towards suppressing that uniqueness and moving us all toward the democratic ideal of mindless automatons who always follow the rules, never question our masters, and never, never express our individuality.

Please write your Senate and House representatives and ask them to vote against Senate Bill 735. Be an American.

If Hastert Has To Resign The Terrorists Win

 Congress, Corruption, Election, Gay Issues, Politics, Society  Comments Off on If Hastert Has To Resign The Terrorists Win
Oct 042006

I guess you might think I’m doing a parody, but you’d be wrong. So help me, the Republican Congressional Leadership is spinning so hard right now, I think they have made themselves dizzy. In one of the most bizarre “spins” of this whole Foley episode, House Speaker Denny Hastert has managed to blame it all on “terrorists.”

Interviewed by Rush Limbaugh today, House Speaker Hastert said Mark Foley’s inappropriate behavior was “a political issue” and promised Rush that “we are going on offense.”

The “offense” is an effort to portray the scandal as a conspiracy specifically timed by liberals to affect the elections. “We are the insulation to protect this country,” Hastert declared, “and if they get to me it looks like they could affect our election as well”:

SPEAKER HASTERT: There were two pieces of paper out there, one that we knew about and we acted on; one that happened in 2003 we didn’t know about, but somebody had it, and, you know, they’re trying – and they drop it the last day of the session, you know, before we adjourn on an election year. Now, we took care of Mr. Foley. We found out about it, asked him to resign. He did resign. He’s gone. We asked for an investigation. We’ve done that. We’re trying to build better protections for these page programs.

But, you know, this is a political issue in itself, too, and what we’ve tried to do as the Republican Party is make a better economy, protect this country against terrorism – and we’ve worked at it ever since 9/11, worked with the president on it – and there are some people that try to tear us down. We are the insulation to protect this country, and if they get to me it looks like they could affect our election as well.

OK, so Mark Foley was a closeted gay man, and happened to be into younger guys. The guy was being sleazy in general, and I have no doubt he had sex with a page or two. That’s bad, but worse, now it’s all because he was drinking at the time. Let’s remember that at least one of the exchanges we know about was during a vote. So, he was voting while impaired. Oh, and just to put a little icing on the cake, he was abused by a clergyman when he was a teenager…so, in sticking with the standard Republican modus operandi, he’s not really responsible for his actions. I thought Republicans were the party of “personal responsibility.”

Now, let’s look at this a little deeper. Interesting that all these Pages just happened to have saved their IM and e-mail exchanges with the Congressman. Page’s get selected usually as payback to political supporters, many of the Pages have their own political aspirations, and often return to D.C. to work. I’d be curious to find out how many got jobs as a result of intervention by Foley.

Anyway, lots of twists and turns to this case. As bad as Foley’s actions were, as usual, the attempt by the other politicians to minimize his actions, spin their own actions (or lack thereof), cover it up, and then, as Denny Hastert is doing, try to find some convoluted way to gain political points is far worse. Hastert had a chance early on to be a leader and say, “you know, I was made aware of this. Based on what we actually saw then, I thought we’d taken care of it appropriately. Obviously we did not, and I regret that. I assure you we will see to it that this matter is aggressively investigated by everyone that should be involved.”

He didn’t, and he won’t. Of course now, they have asked the Attorney General and Florida authorities to look into it. This will give them their out…now they can start saying, “Well I really can’t comment on an on-going investigation.” And then there is this Congressman Reynolds guy who’s involved. Holy cow, at every one of his campaign stops now he is literally using children as a shield to avoid having to answer questions about this. That’s some real good old fashioned Republican Family Values on display for you.

Waiting For The Black Helicopters

 Congress, Constitution, Politics, Presidency, The Courts  Comments Off on Waiting For The Black Helicopters
Sep 302006

Since I’ve been blogging about the abuses, lies and failures of the Bush administration, a former co-worker and good friend used joke with me to, “watch my back,” and that I could expect to find black helicopters hoovering over my house any day now. Others have given me advice, “These people are capable of anything. Stay off small planes, make sure you aren’t being followed.”

I always laughed and shook my head whenever I heard this stuff. Extreme paranoia wrapped in the tinfoil of conspiracy, I thought. This is still America, and these Bush fools will soon pass into history, I thought. I am a citizen, and the First Amendment hasn’t yet been red-lined, I thought.

Matters are different now.

It seems, perhaps, that the people who warned me were not so paranoid. It seems, perhaps, that I was not paranoid enough. Legislation passed by the Republican House and Senate, legislation now marching up to the Republican White House for signature, has shattered a number of bedrock legal protections for suspects, prisoners, and pretty much anyone else George W. Bush deems to be an enemy.

So much of this legislation is wretched on the surface. Habeas corpus has been suspended for detainees suspected of terrorism or of aiding terrorism, so the Magna Carta-era rule that a person can face his accusers is now gone. Once a suspect has been thrown into prison, he does not have the right to a trial by his peers. Suspects cannot even stand in representation of themselves, another ancient protection, but must accept a military lawyer as their defender.

Illegally-obtained evidence can be used against suspects, whether that illegal evidence was gathered abroad or right here at home. To my way of thinking, this pretty much eradicates our security in persons, houses, papers, and effects, as stated in the Fourth Amendment, against illegal searches and seizures.

“Coerced evidence would be permissible if a judge considered it reliable – already a contradiction in terms – and relevant. Coercion is defined in a way that exempts anything done before the passage of the 2005 Detainee Treatment Act, and anything else Mr. Bush chooses.”      Continue reading »

Chertoff: If We Inspect Cargo The Terrorists Win

 Crime, Politics, Presidency, Society  Comments Off on Chertoff: If We Inspect Cargo The Terrorists Win
Sep 142006

Well that’s a unique argument, even from the always-creative Bush administration.

You see, Osama’s goal is to bankrupt us – or so we hear. And that means that if we scan cargo coming into the US to make sure it doesn’t contain a nuclear bomb, well, that would cost money, and spending money is what Osama wants us to do. So, wise man that Chertoff is (you’ll recall, he was in charge of Hurrice Katrina response), we’re going to outsmart Osama and not spend much money at all on checking for nukes.

Take that, Tall One!

Of course, if Chertoff and Bush were serious about not bankrupting the country, they’d figure out what to do about Bush’s great adventure in Iraq that’s costing us nearly $100 billion a year. That would buy a lot of anti-nuke protection.

But hey, no one ever accused Republicans of wanting to spend money on anything other than tax cuts and invading small countries. And no one ever accused the Bush administration of actually making us safer.