Listen to Lead

This entry is part 6 of 6 in the series Journey Through Stoicism

“Listen to lead.” I saw this phrase this past week while walking through the vendor area at the Florida Annual Conference of the United Methodist Church. Palm Beach Atlantic University had it on stickers and t-shirts. It caused me to pause for a moment. I’ve been on a contemplative journey lately that started with a challenge to consider some lessons from the Stoics. I’d been looking for the next topic; inspiration struck when I saw that sticker.

It’s a short phrase, almost a throwaway line. But in truth, it holds the weight of a philosophy that the ancient Stoics would have nodded toward in agreement. Leadership, they believed, was not about domination or control. It was about integrity, humility, and reason. And none of those are possible without listening.

You can’t lead well if you don’t listen well. I once learned that lesson the hard way.

The Plan That Should Have Worked

I managed a large COM (computer output to microfilm) production operation years ago. We ran around the clock—three daily shifts, six days a week, and a single shift on the seventh. It was a high-demand environment, with tight turnaround requirements and a workload that ebbed and flowed in ways that didn’t always align with traditional staffing.

At one point, we had some employee attrition. Corporate budget cuts meant we couldn’t replace those positions. I had to get creative about distributing our available person-hours to match the work.

I did what I thought was smart leadership. I analyzed the incoming workload, mapped peaks and valleys across the week, and devised a revised schedule. It slightly staggered some workers’ start times and gave most employees a three-day weekend every other week while preserving their 40 hours.

From a mathematical and operational perspective, it was a thing of beauty.

So I gathered the team in the conference room, presented a few graphs, and rolled out the new schedule with what I expected would be met with enthusiasm and appreciation. It wasn’t. The mood was flat. Eyes down. A few furrowed brows. The excitement I expected was nowhere to be found. That plan hit the conference room table with a thud.

Finally, someone quietly asked, “Could we maybe talk about this together and make a few suggestions?”

The Power of Letting Go

So I left the room. I left the team with the graphs, the constraints, and the requirements. I told them that as long as their proposal met the operational needs, I’d consider anything they came up with.

About 45 minutes later, two employees entered my office with a new schedule. No three-day weekends. No fancy staggered shifts. But every single worker had agreed to it.

I reviewed the schedule. It met our requirements. Just to be sure, I spoke with each person individually. “Are you good with this?” I asked. Every single one of them said yes.

We adopted their plan. And it worked beautifully.

The Stoic Insight

The Stoics had much to say about leadership, not as a role of superiority but as a duty of virtue. Marcus Aurelius, emperor of Rome and a man burdened with power, reminded himself daily: “If someone can prove me wrong and show me my mistake in any thought or action, I shall gladly change. I seek the truth, which never harmed anyone.”

That’s not a quote from a weak leader. It’s a quote from a strong one, because true strength doesn’t fear correction. It welcomes it. Epictetus, the former slave turned philosopher, said: “We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.”

The principle is clear: leadership isn’t about speaking first or speaking loudest. It’s about listening well, especially to those closest to the work, the challenge, and the people. Perhaps Adam Grant (organizational psychologist and author of Think Again) said it best when he wrote, “Listening well is more than a matter of talking less. It’s a set of skills in asking and responding. A good listener doesn’t just hear you—they help you hear yourself.”

My schedule plan may have been clever, but it wasn’t wise because I failed to listen first, to ask. The Stoics would tell you that wisdom without humility isn’t wisdom at all. Leadership Isn’t Control. It’s Trust.

When I let the team talk and walked out of that conference room, I gave up control and gained collaboration. I gave them ownership. And what they returned was better than my plan: not because it was more efficient, but because it was theirs. It was trusted. It was lived in.

That experience reframed my understanding of leadership. Listening is not abdicating authority. It is honoring reality. The people closest to the problem often have the clearest view of the solution. A leader’s role is not to dictate from above but to clear space for insight from below.

The Stoics weren’t management theorists, but they understood this dynamic well. They believed in acting according to nature, including human nature—the nature of trust, reason, and cooperation.

In a Noisy World, Be a Listener

We live in a time that rewards quick answers, hot takes, and performative certainty. But authentic leadership rarely looks like that. It looks more like quiet listening, patient asking, and humble rethinking. It looks like leaving the room.

And so today, I try to remember that lesson. I still make plans and do the analysis, but I don’t confuse having the authority to decide with having the wisdom to decide alone. Listening isn’t a weakness. It’s a discipline.

It’s the work of leading with virtue, of becoming better than your assumptions. It’s the work of showing others that their voices matter—before you speak your own. That’s Stoicism in action. That’s leadership rooted in humility.

And I’m grateful I learned it. Eventually.