Why Are Conservatives So Afraid

When our nation was founded, we had men of real character and courage fighting for their nascent America, one in which liberty and freedom trumped the authoritative tendencies of the monarchy. Patrick Henry gave words to those efforts:

Give me liberty or give me death!

My, how far we have fallen, with an administration that parlays the incessant fear of its supporters into increased authoritativeness to the point where he now resembles the very despot we fought in our war of independence.

And his supporters bellow, as they cower under their beds:

Here’s our liberties, just spare us from death!

These blowhards pretend they are macho even as they piddle on themselves in abject terror from every "boo!" that comes out of Osama Bin Laden’s mouth. They like to speak about how tough they are, even though they send others to fight their battles and couldn’t last a day in places like Iraq, or Sudan, or El Salvador, or any other war-torn nation.

Now I may not be as "emotionally or morally sophisticated" as some on the right think they are, but then I didn’t spend the afternoon of 9/11 flushing away my beliefs and convictions in a piss-stained panic. So please spare me the "cojones" and "cowardice" locker room speech from the people who are one car backfire away from turning into a fedora floating in a puddle of pee.

You wanna run into the arms of the big strong steely-eyed rocket man? Be my guest. But when he picks your pocket, steals you car and leaves you high and dry in some cheap motel near Waco, don’t come crying to me.

The breathtaking cowardice of Republicans knows no bounds. They hide behind the American flag and our genuinely brave men and women in uniform. It’s bad enough that they wouldn’t deign to join the boots in the ground in Iraq. But now they make a mockery of our Constitution, for the very values that motivated our Founding Fathers to put their lives on the line to combat the unchecked powers of the British monarchy.